weird little things you probably shouldn't know about me and might make you think I'm crazy:

--- I am addicted to this really cool vanilla lipbalm called "Soft Lips." Well, the weird thing is (and I swear by it) I rub a bit on my face in places where I'm prone to getting pimples (my chin) and I swear that's why my face has been clear for umpteen weeks. There must be some active ingredient in this fantastic lipbalm that just stops pimples before they even start. Was that a line from a Clearasil commercial?

--- I like to pluck hair. I pluck my eyebrows and some unruly eyelashes that just won't curl and I like that little tweezer pain. I'm sure somewhere it's called some really long name and is labelled a disease, but frankly, I'm nutty enough as it is so I don't need to be labelled something else.

--- Right now, all I want to do is buy DVD's and magazines. I have about 30 magazines I haven't read yet and about 15 DVD's I haven't watched yet and I feel secure enough knowing I just may end up throwing them out in a few years.

--- It takes me years to throw out old magazines. I tend to keep them because there's some really good informative articles or tidbits that I assume will help me: land a guy, increase my metabolism, look thinner, have flawless skin, create a more natural looking makeup job, etc... Sometimes it pains me to throw them away because I'm just too lazy to go through them and rip out the articles.

--- I love the crossword puzzles from People and InTouch magazines so much I photocopy them just in case I want to redo them.

--- I may have written this already, but I cannot pee on command. I'm the only woman in the entire world who cannot pee on command. Sometimes I have to sit in the stall with my hearing aids off and my eyes closed thinking I'm all alone in the bathroom just to pee! And I especially cannot pee if there's somebody I know in another stall next to me. I'll sit there til doomsday waiting for her to leave first.

--- And on that note, I cannot stand it when there are multiple stalls in the public bathroom and a woman decides to go into the one right next to me. Why? Why not go into the one two doors down? Why do you need to sit and pee RIGHT NEXT TO ME when the bathroom is EMPTY? Does it help you pee faster? Give me my privacy.

--- I never did get the whole "oh we're women let's all go to the bathroom together" thing. It's one of the most ridiculous concepts in the world. If we were camping would you squat down right next to me and share a leaf? Gawd.

--- I cannot share batteries. If I buy AA batteries for my discman I will NOT give you some from my package. I would much rather cut out my own kidney than give you my precious batteries. In the past when I have shared my batteries, I always ran out of juice and was left without music for the rest of the day. That makes me cranky.

You don't want to see me cranky.